Keeping up

I'll have to read back and see when my day is...tomorrow? I think that is what Amy wrote. I'll catch up to you guys some time in the near future.

I nearly freaked at my drs appointment yesterday. There was no real good reason for it either. She walked in, said hello and I was in tears. Peter went with me as he was really worried about me, but I made him wait in the waiting room. I did read an article the other day about post traumatic stress disorder being diagnosed in adults whose parents had cancer while they were growing up. It was so true it was actually a bit frightening. After reading that, I definitely have exhibited nearly all of the signs, and while most of them have gone away, there are still a few that linger. My irrational response to my own potential health issues is one of them. I used to have a panic attack whenever the phone rang--I knew there would be a time when I got a call tha tmy mom was dying or dead, and my heart would race and my breathing would get weird, etc anytime the phone rang anywhere I went. Thank god that went away. I actually didn't get a cell phone right away because of that. Crazy. The doctor did have to take a biopsy, so hopefully next week I'll hear what that was all about (please keep you fingers crossed it is something my immune system can deal with.) She said the majority of the time that is the case, then sometimes they give you medicine to help, in fewer cases it is HPV and then in the fewest cases it develops into cancer.

My eating has been odd due to stress. Thursday I had nothing for breakfast, a danish and dt pepsi for lunch with some shrimp bisque, and cereal for dinner. Today Peter brought me a bacon, egg & cheese bagel when he came home off night work so we could have breakfast together before I went to work, and we met for lunch and ate pork bar b q. Not great, but I doubt I'll eat anything more today as he is on night work again.

I am so sleepy right now it sucks. I have SO much to do after work. Maybe I will try to sneak in a nap.

I have been pretty sad since yesterday too--right before I left work for my appointment, I found out the most horrible thing. It is just heart breaking. One of our clients that I worked with died during surgery the day Wednesday. Here's the email my boss sent out after she was notified:

It is with deep regret to inform you that one of our customers, Daria Hardin, Chief of Comprehensive Planning with the City of Annapolis passed away yesterday. During a routine surgery to have a benign tumor removed, Daria’s heart stopped. Daria gave birth to twins this past June, of which one passed away immediately after delivery. She leaves behind a husband, 3-month old daughter and 5-year old daughter. Please keep them in your thoughts and prayers.

I really do not like when bad things happen to good people, nor when the bad things seem to be happening disproportionately to the same good people. Her poor family. I have a tough time coping with things like this. I just want to ask "Dear God, What were you thinking?!?!?!" But, I guess at the end of the day, $hit happens. What are you to do but live each day like it is your last.

Well, I've been a bundle of joy, so I'll sign off for now. Sorry.