Insomniac

Since last Tuesday, I have had exactly ONE night where I didn't wake up two or three (or four) hours before I'd had a solid night's sleep. This is extremely unlike me. I slept solidly through midnight sun; why can't I sleep when it's dark outside and I'm exhausted? I'm managing not to be completely cranky, but I am drained dry by the end of the day. I thought the problem was Daniel's absence -- the morning Cecilia slept with me I was able to go back to sleep -- but today he was back and I still woke up. I'm too groggy to want to get up but can't actually sleep, so I waste two or three hours in a haze getting no real rest.

My current theory is that since it's not Daniel's fault it must be the lack of exercise catching up to me; I've been consistent at exercise for years now (Norway being the notable exception), so this two-month stretch with only a handful of exercise days is throwing my system out of whack. Daniel thinks this is a reasonable theory and is coming home early enough today for me to get to the gym. After the new year I'll be back into a reasonable routine, and choir is more or less disappearing, so I'll have at least one more day when I can make appointments to exercise.

Yet the uncharacteristic weight decline has continued. Today I was at 140.0, but that was my highest all week; I actually saw 137.5 the day before yesterday. I think that day I was dehydrated. I'm not eating much (I keep forgetting lunch and wolfing down a half-dinner on my way out the door to someplace) and definitely not drinking enough. Of course I'm happy to see lower numbers on the scale, but I'd really rather see them for the right reasons, because the pounds will come back with a vengeance when things calm down (and I start sleeping again).